A long long time ago, in a garden far far away, there lived a man called Pasqual. The Self-Proclaimed Nomadic Spanish Viking Gardener/Fighter Pilot (the most feared in all of Norway).

Now, Pasqual had a garden which he loved very much, but it was in dire need of help. In truth - his garden blew. It was dying. The Nordic Phytologist became sad - and so he cried.

Ah - but that night as he slept, Pasqual had a dream. He dreamt of a Utopian Garden so green it called out to him "Pasqual come." The next morning saw the Norse Spaniard setting out on his Quest for the Utopian Garden.

Meanwhile, out in the forest, hordes of Nasty Weeds (led by The Evil #12) were lying in ambush for poor Pasqual. They attacked without warning (that's what "ambush" means) and the Viking Gardener found himself ankle deep in the nastiest of Nasty Weeds. Just when all seemed lost, Pasqual remembered a time in his childhood when he was trained in the ancient Viking art of arc welding - so he took out his trusty butane torch and set all the Nasty Weeds aflame in one fell swoop.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, a gila monster wearing a football helmet appeared on a big wheel (the kind with the cool hand brake). He said he was The Keeper - one of the Watchers of the Woods - and thanked Pasqual for ridding the area of the Nasty Weeds. He gave Pasqual a big swirly lollipop engraved with a cryptic message. Before Pasqual could say anything, The Keeper peddled off.

Pasqual thought and thought and discovered that he was to lick the Lollipop-O-Life thrice, and so he did. There was a blinding light and a deafening scream (well - not really deafening - but it was bein' all loud - oh - and the light was almost blinding, but not quite capable of causing any permanent retinal damage) and the ground shook and she appeared. Princess Gardenia - the most beautiful woman Pasqual had ever laid eyes upon. He and the Garden Princess fell deeply in love and were whisked away to their Utopian Garden on a chariot pulled by a team of flying squirrels with duck feet and snorkels. (In fact, the whole snorkel/diving mask ensemble was all the rage with the squirrels that year - kind of like clogs, bell bottoms, and disco were in the years to come - what with denim being such a scarce commodity and all in those times, and considering all the drownings that previous summer, the squirrels settled for scuba gear; for even with their duck feet, they were no match for the strong currents.)

Pasqual and Princess Gardenia lived an eternity bein' all blissful in their Utopian Garden.